«A fascinating, well-paced, beautifully written memoir.»

(Professor Sarah Moore Fitzgerald, Author and Director, MA in Creative Writing, University of Limerick, Ireland)

«A wonderfully honest, often witty, personal account from someone who experienced discrimination -and challenged it - at every level of academia. So much of what has changed for women in recent decades is chronicled through Pat's life, research and actions. A tour de force.»

(Micheline Sheehy Skeffington, plant ecologist and feminist activist)

«This book evokes the lived experience of a woman who, out of her time, marshalled the brains, the courage and—I have to say it—the sheer bloody-minded and tireless determination to confront others with one question: 'why?'. Asking the question came at no small personal cost, but—slowly and surely—it started to prise open some of the seemingly impenetrable male-centric power edifices that exist across academia; openings which now give so many others hope. Don't be afraid of reading this book about the lifetime of someone who asked why, it may just inspire you to do the same.»

(Paul Walton, Professor of Chemistry, University of York, UK and international gender equality advocate)

This book, written by an insider, explores experiences over a 46-year career in five academic organisations in Ireland and the UK: moving from contract research assistant to full professor and line manager (Dean). Highlighting success and failure, strength and fragility, it challenges ideas about what it is to be a 'proper' woman. It describes the subtle and relentless processes of devaluation, marginalisation and disempowerment that are often 'normalised.' Written in a clear accessible style, with flashes of humour, it asks whose interests are served by taken-for-granted ideas about what it is to be a woman – ideas which deny the reality of many women's day-to-day experiences. Who wants us to think that all women find identity and satisfaction in housework and child care? Who wants us to think that universities are meritocratic institutions? The book will inspire and entertain all those who have struggled in any male-dominated organisation and wondered if they were the problem.